Proverbs 31: 1 The words of King Lemuel, the utterance which his mother taught him:
2 What, my son? And what, son of my womb? And what, son of my vows?
3 Do not give your strength to women, nor your ways to that which destroys kings.
Mother Bathsheba had gotten her 1st husband killed because she was messing around with David, the rich guy in the big house across the street, while her husband was deployed to a combat zone (2 Samuel 11).
2 What, my son? And what, son of my womb? And what, son of my vows?
3 Do not give your strength to women, nor your ways to that which destroys kings.
Proverbs 31: 1-3. The last chapter of Proverbs recounts the words of a king named Lemuel and the words of Lemuel’s mother. It’s unclear though who Lemeul and his mom were.
The name Lemuel means “for God” or “belonging to God.” That might have been one of Solomon’s nicknames, which would make Bathsheba the mother King Lemuel quotes in this passage. Or, perhaps Lemuel was another name for Rehoboam, Solomon’s son and successor. King Rehoboam’s mother was an Ammonite named Naamah.
Though their advice makes it into the annals of Biblcal wisdom, neither of these ladies was the stereotypically perfect mother.
Though their advice makes it into the annals of Biblcal wisdom, neither of these ladies was the stereotypically perfect mother.
Mother Bathsheba had gotten her 1st husband killed because she was messing around with David, the rich guy in the big house across the street, while her husband was deployed to a combat zone (2 Samuel 11).
Mama Naamah was one of a thousand women Solomon had had (literally 1,000, 1 Kings 11: 3). Somehow she’d worked her way into the number 1 spot and corrupted her “good man” with her pagan ways.
For it was so, when Solomon was old, that his wives turned his heart after other gods; and his heart was not loyal to the Lord his God, as was the heart of his father David. For Solomon went after Ashtoreth the goddess of the Sidonians, and after Milcom the abomination of the Ammonites. (1 Kings 11: 4, 5)
Whether Bathsheba or Namaah, the mother of Proverbs 31 has a pretty scandalous backstory. So, the advice in Proverbs 31, especially the opening warning is more than a little ironic.
Mama said, “Don’t waste your energy chasing women. Women will mess up a successful man.”
Sisters, as a man and a son let me explain something to you. When you tell your baby boy, “You can’t trust no woman,” the first woman that your son looks at suspiciously-------- is you.
You can’t tell a male human being that it’s O.K. for him to live with you forever and never fully commit to another woman AND simultaneously complain about his daddy being immature and not fulfilling responsibilities to you. The two can’t both be correct. It makes YOU sound suspect.
Despite her past, Lemuel’s mother understood this. So though Proverbs 31 begins with a warning about women, the rest of the chapter elaborates on that advice and makes it clear that not all women are bad. It’s just bad women who are bad.
Mama not only teaches her little prince to be careful about women, she also teaches him how to recognize a good woman. This means that even though she was not herself a perfect woman, even though she knew that at any point she might be the baddest of 1,000 bad girls, though she and her husband had done major wrong in the course of their relationship----- King Lemuel’s mother still taught her son that, “Yes, baby, there are good women out there.”
Any mother who teaches her little prince about the bad of other women without also teaching him the good has herself become one of those women who helps destroy a potential king.
A son is supposed to leave his mother one day. A son is SUPPOSED TO find a woman, a good woman, whose love becomes MORE important than his mother’s.
Therefore a man SHALL leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. (Genesis 2: 24)
SHALL LEAVE. “Should leave.” IS SUPPOSED TO GROW THE CRAP UP AND LEAVE!
He can either be God’s man or mama’s little boy. He cannot be both.
---Anderson T. Graves II is a writer, community organizer and consultant for education, ministry, and rural leadership development.
Rev. Anderson T. Graves II is pastor of Hall Memorial CME Church in Montgomery, Alabama.
To hear sermons, read devotions, and learn more about the ministry at Hall Memorial CME Church, visit www.hallmemorialcme.blogspot.com .
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Mail all contributions to :
Hall Memorial CME Church
541 Seibles Road
Montgomery, AL 36116
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