A WORD TO THE WISE. Proverbs 29: 22

Proverbs 29: 22     An angry man stirs up strife, and a furious man abounds in transgression.

Proverbs 29: 22.   Before Cain killed his brother Abel, God confronted Cain about the danger of surrendering to his “anger issues.”

So the Lord said to Cain, “Why are you angry? And why has your countenance fallen?  If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin lies at the door. And its desire is for you, but you should rule over it.” (Genesis 4: 6)

The Apostle Paul, a bachelor whose writings about submission have been fodder for many a his & her argument over the years, admonished men to reject the image of the perpetually angry husband.

Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them. (Colossians 3: 19)

The Apostle Peter, Jesus’ best friend, warned against being perpetually angry and refusing to understand the other person, especially when you have the power to dominate the other person in a relationship.  Peter said that this kind of relational meanness is so abominable that God won’t even listen to you while you practice it.

Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.  (1 Peter 3:7)

Jesus Himself taught that unchecked “anger issues” put you in spiritual danger from the judgment of God.

But I say to you that whoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment. (Matthew 5: 22)

You can get mad without actually sinning (Ephesians 4: 26), but if you carry that anger and bitterness from day to day, to day, to day---- you’re walking into dangerous and prohibited spiritual territory.

That evil, ugly, chip-on-the-shoulder-so-big-you-can’t-walk-straight attitude you project all the doggone time?  Let it go.

Maybe it did all start because someone did you wrong.  Maybe you started acting this way because everybody around you was mean and angry.  Maybe this is your defense mechanism, a way you’ve learned to cope so that you don’t get hurt again.  Maybe so. 

But that’s not all it is anymore. 

Perpetual anger, nurtured bitterness, grudges hoarded and held over time melt into a weight on your soul that draws sin to you and from you.

Haven’t you noticed how people can be in a room happy and at ease with one another until one certain other person arrives.  The moment that person enters the room the entire mood gets darker.  The weight of one person’s bitterness and anger can be a black hole that sucks up all the joy and ejects streams of strife in its wake.

Your anger doesn’t protect you from drama.  It contributes to the drama.  Your bitterness does not make you immune to haters.  It makes you susceptible to sin. (Proverbs 22: 10)

Don’t just manage your anger; relinquish it. 

Don’t just learn to live at peace with you bitterness.  Learn to live without it.     

---Anderson T. Graves II   is a writer, community organizer and consultant for education, ministry, and rural leadership development.

Rev. Anderson T. Graves II is pastor of Hall Memorial CME Church in Montgomery, Alabama.

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